Thursday, May 14, 2009

Am I potty training or labor coaching?


Bryson has mastered the potty (with the exception of night time). Just typing that will probably jinx the whole thing but I feel confident in saying he's pretty well mastered it. We haven't had an accident in several weeks now. There is one major problem though. Well, it may not be a problem but it's definitley annoying and exhausting. When it's time to do the dirty job, #2, poo-poo, whatever you want to call it, it's complete chaos. Rather than just saying "I need to use the potty" like he normally does he starts screaming and running all over house like a mental patient. Obviously, that's the cue so I herd him towards the potty and plop him on it. He refuses to use the potty chair because he can't stand to get it dirty so he sits on the big potty and cries, screams, kicks and has a complete come-apart. I am in no way exaggerating people. It's ridiculous. So after being kicked and usually poked in the eye then I have to say "Come on Bryson, you can do it! Squeeze my hands, PUSH!!!" By the end of our 10-15 minute ordeal I feel like I've just delivered a baby just to flush it away. Sometimes I really just want to scream at him JUST DO IT ALREADY!!!!! Seriously, what takes the male species so long?? I will never in a million years understand that one but apparently it starts right from the beginning. Oh, and the real kicker? As soon as he's finally done his business, he laughs & says "lookie there momma! clean me up!" His mood has completely changed while I'm left sitting by the toilet exhausted and in a horrible mood. It would help if Jay could do potty duty for these jobs but when he tries to take him Bryson just tells him he wants to do it the way mommy does it.
Maybe my next career will be a midwife.

6 comments:

Little Gifts From God said...

I just about laughed until I cried when I was reading your post. I can just picture what you said. Bless his heart!!

A Lovell said...

You are hilarious! But what mommy hasn't spent hours (collectivly) on the bathroom floor coaching the poo-poo out.

The Peppermint Porch said...

How funny.....you kinda sound like me. It takes Carter forever to poop! And what's really funny is he likes to count what he left behind!!! What a subject!! :)

Leanne Helums said...

I rarely laugh out loud at too many blogs, but this is hilarious!!! I could not wait to share this one.

Dana said...

I thought I would have a come apart while reading this! You are so funny. I can't wait for my two to get to this stage. Good Luck!

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