Thursday, May 21, 2009

My Male Nurse Encounter

I've had a little heart issue ever since I was a baby and lately I've been having some trouble so I had to go in to see my cardiologist. His office is in the Heart Center & I've been over there several times but if you've ever been or even passed by you know that place is huge. There are several doctors so there are tons of staff. Well in all my visits I've never encountered a male nurse. As soon as you go back to a room they check your blood pressure and do an EKG. Well last week when I went in the nurse (female) was updating my information and going through the 15 minute questionnaire when a guy knocked on the door and wheeled in the EKG machine and said "I'll go ahead and do this for you while you're getting her information". She told him that was okay she'd get it but he insisted. I was thinking No...really! I'm in no rush-she can do it! But of course I didn't say that because he was obviously trying to be helpful. If you've never had an EKG it means you have to sit there bare-breasted while they hook up the little thingys to your body and get a reading. So then he said it "Lift up your shirt to your chin please". Cringe. He did at least let me keep my bra on though which I was ever so thankful for. All the while the girl was still asking me all these stupid questions like "Do you have black tarry stool?", etc. and my job is to answer and keep holding my shirt up to my chin. Well I was avoiding all eye contact with male nurse for obvious reasons but I did glance over at him to realize he was having to squat down to try and stick the things up my shirt. Apparently in my attempt to pretend he wasn't there I was holding it straight out rather than up. So I apologized and pulled it on up. He was really polite about it and I know that's his job but that didn't mean I was prepared for it. I have absolutely nothing against male nurses I just think in somewhere like a cardiolgist or say obgyn's office that they should post a warning or something. You know, MALE NURSE ON DUTY so at least you can mentally prepare.

After I had some more tests I was sent to another room to wait on the doctor to come back in and I heard the male nurse in the room next to me. He was helping what had to be a really old woman. She sounded about 118 years old and she had another lady who sounded to be a caretaker in there with her. Everyone was screaming at her because she couldn't hear them and the male nurse shouted "If you could just hold up your left breast please" then after 5 minutes or so he shouted again "You can go ahead and sit it back down now". I was feeling embarrased for me before but now I was mortifyed for everyone in that room! I could obviously use a little extra help in the bust department but I'm so grateful I don't have to be instructed to pick up my breast and set it back down--especially by a male nurse.

I wasn't even going to post anything about this because it just seemed odd writing about my boobs but I had to go back in today for some more tests and he came out to the waiting area to call someone in (not me thankfully) and gave me a little smile. I know he was just being friendly but all I could think about was that poor guy he had to look at my boobs...and that old lady's.


Angel said...

Ok. That's got to be one of the funniest things ever! The old lady part not yours. I would've been embarrassed too. Now I know what I can tell on my next blog. I have a funny story kinda like that from my last visit to the dentist. Though no nudity is involved. :)

The Burns Family said...

Your blogs always make me laugh til I cry. I always look forward to your next story!